等待。。。

here goes another... ranting post?! haha... 
don't know whether to be counted as that or not... 
haha... oh well...
going to be typing in chinese...
so... if my sis is reading this... sorry...
but it's better for me to say in chinese... xp


你們有沒有嘗試過等待...
無論是人，事，物...


我覺得，我每一分每一秒都在等...
等甚麼，有時候我自己也不知道...
有時候真的會覺得... 
無奈...
沒意義...


等公車...
等朋友...
等家人...
等成績...
等...
... ... ...
對的人...


人往往在小的時候會覺得...
只要我快點長大，我就能得到我要的東西...
但... 真的是這樣嗎？


有的人則覺得...
有時候，要等待才能得到你想要的東西...
但... 是嗎？


有些事情我並不清楚...
但... 我知道...
有些時候...
等待...
不一定能解決事情...
不一定就能得到你所希望擁有的...
反而...
可能會讓它“飄”走...
就因為... 你沒好好追求你想要的...
因為... 沒好好把握機會... 讓機會流失...
而這... 也許會讓你後悔...
但... 也很難改過來了...


“等一下”...  
“等等我”...  
“可以等我嗎”...
這幾個字或許你會覺得沒甚麼...
但... 如果... 你聽了很多次...
而且... 是從一個很特別的人口中說出來的呢...？
你... 的回答... 又會是甚麼...？
是... “我會等你”... 嗎？


真的覺得... 這樣子一直等下去也不是辦法...
沒目標...
沒目的...
沒... 期限...
無限的這樣等下去...
你... 接受得了嗎...？
不會... 覺得... 累... 嗎... ？


我...
有點...
累...
了...


我...
該...
繼續...
等下去...
嗎... ?


雨

CONCERT!!!

went and played(really played) through my PSP interview for music box today...

the whole 4 stages i was playing...

was intending to withdraw from it as what ying ying had done...

but decided to just go for it...

no harm... haha... but don't like the theory part...

don't know the answers for it...

who cares... all over...

didn't really read up for it...

ohya... received an email saying that i got accepted for internship at the Esplanade...

sep to early oct... one month... no pay... just experience...

classmates still considering... 

me will most probably be going... but not sure... cause no pay...

then i've been spending too much money these days...

學壞了... 亂買CD... hahaha

shall save money!!! 

in the end... in the same department as the irritating guy...

what bad luck...

是想把我氣死嗎?! that guy really got attitude problem lorh...

why until know then i start finding that problem of his irritating...

no wait... it's been a long time... since i knew that...

but... haiz... cause of her... =.=|||

at least during secondary school...

he won't come bother me so much... 

but now same school as him again... and no Diana here... HAIZ!!!

and once again... i shall say... I DO NOT LIKE HIM FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!!! 

on a harsher tone, rather die than like him...

hair... *dies*

attitude... *dies again*

clothes... *dies yet again*

whatever... really don't like guys with long hair... look SUPER WEIRD!!!

those artiste that had long hair before, don't like...

cut short... all become more handsome!...

this goes to show that girls can copy guys... but guys can't copy girls! =.=|||

out of soooo many shaun or sean that i know... =.=|||

only one shaun is handsome, nice and everything...^^

short hair... miss the times where.... AHEM! haha...

AND AND...

kelly say she'll accompany me go Arron's mini concert!!! 

on the 16th!!! WEE!!! YAY!!! but not sure if i'll get the tickets a not... haha

see my luck bah... never get... still never mind... at least i've tried...

今天你生日。。。

祝你。。。

生。。。 

日。。。

快。。。

樂。。。

還。。。 

記得我。。。

嗎。。。？

雨

meet again... =.=

it's always like this...

when u want to forget someone...

something... 

or another person... 

will remind you of that someone again...

I hate that feeling...

YOU! why are you in my memories again?

i hate it...

when i went overseas for that ONE WHOLE FREAKING MONTH...

i thought that maybe i can finally forget about you...

and then suddenly saw this person who looks A LOT like you...

that person totally reminds me of you...

i hate it...

i swear i hate it...

at that point of time, when i realized, i stunned...

memories, like waterfall, just keep pouring into my mind...

appearing and disappearing...

appearing and disappearing...

what is this...?!

i had totally forgot about you for the first 4 weeks...

and then that person had to come and bother me...

had to remind me of you during the last week...

i hate you...

avoid... that's wat you did...

you avoided me...

hate hate hate...

since it's like this... why can't you just leave me alone?!

time... 

needed...

to...

forget...

you...

maybe it's true of what others say...

it takes a lifetime to forget someone...

haha...

but i'll try...

to forget you...

to not let you step into my life again...

to let traces of your memories in me... disappear...

goodbye...

雨

WTH!!!

ever tried dealing with a lot of problems at one go?!


sometimes, i really don't understand why things have to happen all at the same time...
sometimes, you want it to come, but it doesn't...
other times, when you don't want it, it comes rolling into your way...
what exactly is this?!


IF...
i had never gone on that thing...
IF...
i had never heard about it...
IF...
i was that insensitive to things...
IF...
i can don't know anything...
IF...
i don't know them...
IF...
i did not cared...
IF... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
damn... what's the use of listing all the IFs down...
when all has already happened?! what am i thinking?!


if anyone have a cure for me... i'll be glad to take it...
if anyone could share these problems with me... i'll be glad to share...
if anyone can save me from these things... i'll be glad to be saved...
if i can just turn a blind eye to it and not do anything... i'll be glad to do so...
if i can just do that... 
but i can't...


why do you have to just fill me in on the details...
i did not want to know in the first place...
i did not even ask you to tell me...
why are you just so selfish to just dump everything to me...
like i'm your rubbish bin... dumping your trash into me... 
without asking whether i want to know a not...


don't know whether to really believe you or not... 
because you are also biased...
you are involved as well...
i can't help but think that you are saying this to help yourself...
who shall i believe...


lost...
confused... 
frustrated...
angered...
injured...


you tell me to forward it to her... 
but... can i really tell her...?!
NO! i can't...
i can't risk it...
i just hope that they will be more careful of themselves...


and YOU!...
are you really that blur that you just follow whatever they tell you to do?!
just answer without any restrain to any questions?!
are you really the one that i know?!
you are getting to be more and more like a stranger now to me...
who are you?!
do i know you?!
can you please quit playing and return back to your normal self?!
it's scary at the thought...
of how you can just tell them anything and even join in their discussion...
i'm getting tired of trying to see the time when i can tell you things safely...
without the things getting said out... by YOU...
really...
seriously...
feel like dragging you out and ask you everything...
of what is happening...
of what you know about it...
but... i can't as well...


people whom i can trust...
are getting lesser and lesser...
people whom won't harm those that i treasure...
i'm not sure who will that be...
who can i trust now... ?
who won't harm me... ?
who won't harm those that i treasure... ?
i know not...


迷惑...
失望...
受傷...
無法言語...


雨

exam!!!

having EM3A exam later at 6.30pm...
after that, got to go down to LT 26 for opening ceremony... (just for a while^^)

one thing made me super happy today!!!
got to sign out DSLR from school!!! YAY!!!
got a Nikon D80... damn cool!!!
got to have it for the whole of this sem!!! YAY!!!
cool max!!!

雨

rants?!

just reached home like don't know how many minutes or just an hour ago?!
hmmmm... went to bathe... then sat down at the dining table and ate green bean soup^^
while... studying for Jap quiz tomorrow... haiz...


revision and the rehearsal went quite well just now?!
haha... got to see the main comm's performance...
that's the good thing about being in PA department^^
got to play with the lightings too! ^^
haha... but oh well...
got teased by Timothy again... haha...
don't really care though... 


(dad's driving me to sleep while i'm typing this post... HAH! o.O)
few thoughts drawn out by an artist (fits my feelings now):

雨

worried~

EM3A exams on Friday... day when we have Hi!Club Opening Ceremony...
haiz... hating Mr Kwek for that...
seriously... though... if not for polling day...
the day for the paper wont be pushed back...
damn sian...
having revision class later... then rehearsal for opening ceremony?!
hmmmmmmm...
hope will get good results for EM3A...


one thing's bottled up in my heart...
should i say it in here...
feels that it's not very safe...
haiz... hmmm... sandra knows... haha...
but she'll be blur if anyone ask her what thing... 
so... don't...
nvm... shall not say today... haha...
though i feel like saying...


當我在微薄上得知你生病了...
你知道我有多擔心嗎...
請你一定要好好的照顧自己...
別讓我們擔心了...
工作歸工作...
你還是要休息的啊...
你吖... 唉...


雨